Single Men Released from Bachelor Reserve

(Onion News Network) There’s great news for women out there looking for love. If you’ve tried going to bars, online dating, or coworkers for finding love and have failed then you’ll be glad to hear that the Obama administration has just released 500,000 well-trained men from the bachelor reserve and many of these men may be headed your way. The Onion News Network was one of the first major news networks to break the story on how President Obama’s signature and action may help women find better quality single men to date. Here’s the story…